I believe it is difficult- if not impossible- to find someone who resembles all your values and beliefs- although I thought I found that person at some point in time-. No one can be the true reflection you need of your own life/self. You should be the only judge of what is right and what is wrong for you.

While discussing my reaction towards life, a friend of mine from work, Rob Sparks, said to me “in life there are many ideas - ideas to explore - test out things - ideas that allow people just to feel...” tell me what would be your feeling if you had someone in your life who can listen to your stories, adventures, mistakes, and stupid ideas/ thoughts, yet, never judge you accordingly! This is what I call a perfect world, or idea, hence, unfortunately it doesn’t exist. 

But, who needs that anyway!

It is a lonely world with a lot of ups and downs along the way and only time can be the cure. My favourite singer “Enya” in her song “Only time” says:

Who can say
where the road goes
where the day flows

And because it is only time which can decide; I wanted to share this vision/ belife changing

experience with you all. My friend Reema and I are best friends since school days. We shared almost the same ups and downs in our lives. We started to drift apart for no reason at all during/after the 3^rd year in the university. Maybe it is the difference in majors, maybe the different friends we decided to take in our lives.

We graduated from the university and during the commencement we were laughing together like crazy. We got separated again. I was working in a company that I hated so much for a year and then I found another job. Surprise! This job is next to Reema’s. Not very close but close enough to be in touch, almost, everyday.

Now, I’m, in fact, writing this piece to thank her so much for changing my view about friends and about people in general. She is one of a kind.

Reema, Thank you for all the times you listened to me when you should be talking about your self, thank you for all the times you took lunch breaks to be with me when you were supposed to be working. Thank you for staying in your job to be close to me- and for your higher salary of course J- while you were supposed to be somewhere in UK now pursuing you higher studies.

So Reema : Hakuna Matata my friend. This is my new philosophy in life and I think it should be yours too :D

Love,

Hala  

I’ve always considered my self to be a strong person who will think before acting and who can control situations/ reactions when they happen. I’ve never been intimidated by any concept/ idea/ thought. I thought that the right words will always find their way out my mouth when I need them to be present and that I will stun my counter partner when that happens.

FALSE!

None of it was right. None of what I thought I am is right and when I discovered that I was in a long state of shock that is still running since 2002. Why 2002? It is the year when I was introduced to the real me- a situation which was enforced over me in a moment when all my guards were down. In 2002 I was with 5 of my friends in an institute trying to get a project solved for a course back in the university days. We took off in one of the girl’s cars to a Mall in order to spend some time there until the project is processed in the institute. The driver took a U turn- and while we were talking and laughing about so many issues in our lives- I felt as if I was hit by a stick on my head and I stopped breathing for a while. 

I saw light turns into a black empty space where I couldn’t see, feel or comprehend anything. The car stopped in the middle of the street and that is when light came back again and pictures started to rush into my head. We were just hit by a car from the opposite direction! I looked at the people who rushed into the accident spot and I heard some one saying “there must be some one died in there!” I took a closer look at my friends in the car; the driver and the girl next to her left the car to check on us in the back seat. They were uninjured at all- thank God. All of that happened in like 15 seconds. In my head I could hear nothing but heavy silence that almost deafens me.

I started looking at my self now. I couldn’t move my hands at all- then I felt my legs were numb too. My left leg was twisted and I tried to move it but I couldn’t. I panicked and I started shacking so hard that the police men thought I am dieing or something. They started talking to me and trying to calm me down. All what I could think about is that I was paralyzed; my back hurts like hell, I can’t move my legs or hands- rational conclusion I guess.

The ambulance arrived and we were rushed into the hospital and all what I could do is cry and scream from pain and I couldn’t stop thinking about the possibility of me being paralyzed for life. When we arrived to the hospital I was scanned and they found out that I had several injuries summed in a broken back and several broken bones here and there. “She will need good 3 months to heal- but she will heal” said the Dr. But, why was I unable to move my self and why my hands and legs were numb?

Fear my friends. Fear is a very strong enemy that most of us are not aware of. It regularly attacks you when you are completely off guarded.

Men are just like the universe; the deeper you sail in, the more wonders you see/ discover.

One day he is so in love with you, the other day he is falling out of love. The problem is not that he is falling in/ out of love; the problem is that he thinks about the whole situation solely, as if there is no 2^nd human being involved in it. He thinks, initiates, fires, and dumps all in a short period of time.

There is a song for Anastasia called “heavy on my heart” and she says in it:

“I try to fly away but it's impossible
And every breath I take gives birth to deeper sighs
And for a moment I am weak
So it's hard for me to speak
Even though we're underneath the same blue sky “ 

A friend of mine is facing a dilemma. A man started expressing his feelings to her with much enthusiasm and without a warning- and as fast as he admitted his admiration to her- he pulled his “hand break” up and stopped the process completely! She sees him every day and smiles in wonder and thinks “what in earth are you thinking about!”

Deep inside- she knows that he is not thinking at all; he simply changed his mind and wants out but can’t tell her in the same frank way he used when he told her he likes her. 

I do believe in this line a lot “if you love something, let it go, if it comes back to you then it is yours. But, if it didn’t, then it never meant to be”.  I think he is lost in his own universe now and that he needs to find his way back alone.